cause' i stole your eggs.

naiveté.

2012-02-14T20:02:00.006+08:00

new word of the day.

from english class.

haha.

valentine's day today eh.

i guess it was pretty good.

today was definitely better than yesterday.

but i still made that stupid decision.

so yesterday we celebrated kexian's birthday,

and today we celebrated binjie's birthday.

with a tinkerbell cake.

hahahahaha.

i guess recess was pretty cool cause there was music.

how i wish we could have music everyday.

that would make recess even more enjoyable.

aha.

so..

gave out the cupcakes in the morning.

jingyi's cupcake was stolen.

maybe i should get her another one.

received chocolates and cards from the people

i least expected to.

which was really nice of them.

thank you, people.

i apologise for spilling my dumb rose water

and smudging every inky card in the bag.

its currently drying out at my window.

what else about today..

i don't know.

don't remember.

hopefully tomorrow will go as planned.

-updated-

okay.

i remembered.

so during english class,

ms jane lectured us.

aw.

and then mrs philip sent a bunch of us out of class for not doing her work properly.

turned out i didn't even passed up the work.

so i told her.

and she said,

"oh, then you can stay out for the rest of the lesson."

with a wide smile.

damn was that funny.

i guess she was in a good mood,

cause she let us all back us almost immediately.

or more like,

she was rushing us to quickly finish up the corrections and then get back in class.

hahaha.

so i can safely say that she's still that nice teacher that i had "wronged" in the past.

alright.

gotta go..

do.

homework?

i don't know.

we'll see.

Faith.

2012-02-13T21:03:00.003+08:00

Scrap the previous post.

if you had already seen it.

i'm just gonna blog anyway.

so today was.

relatively good.

i don't know why,

but whatever.

i don't really feel like talking about my day,

no matter how bad or good it was.

so i came home and made cupcakes for valentine's day..

which was going well.

till.

i ran out of icing.

so i rushed to get more,

but cold storage had no more stock of these.

so i had to get a different one.

so now half the cupcakes(or more) looks terrible and probably tastes diabetic.

this sucks.

now i don't even feel like giving them anymore.

hm.

and yet you still had to say all of that to me.

what the heck is your problem?

shit.

i don't like this.

this isn't the first bloody time i felt like that.

not the second,

not the third.

i've lost count.

how you can affect me so much.

did you really believe it?

because if you had,

then i'm disappointed.

and have possibly lost faith in you.

dad got me roses.

2012-02-12T21:02:00.000+08:00

OH NO OH NO OH NO.

i don't have time to blog.

today was good.

i did.

a lot of things.

but i'm still wishing for it.

goodnight.

Pretense.

2012-02-11T22:36:00.002+08:00

I'm tired.

credits.

Blatant.

2012-02-10T21:29:00.003+08:00

Hello.

so.

school.

normal, as per usual.

its finally friday eh?

and then it'll be monday all over again..

so there were changes in seats during math lesson.

mrs philip wanted us to switch and sit at the front.

meh.

went to mcdonalds for lunch with friends,

and then. choir.

the sec ones are SO. SO. SO. ADORABLE.

though i'm not one who likes kids,

there's this girl who looks like chloe(ng) and she's ABSOLUTELY ADORABLE.

Demure, quiet, and just so so so cute.

i can't.

describe it.

and no im still not a pedophile.

though i still look forward to seeing kyoko.

then went out for dinner with a friend,

and we met Clara.

small talk.

it's been quite a long long long while since i've seen her.

aha.

bought supplies for valentine's day.

and then i switched a total of three buses on the way home.

cause' i didn't want to stand all the way home.

so i switched.

and decided that the bunch of people who were gonna get on at the next stop

is totally gonna make it crowded.

so i switched again.

and ended up on a fairly empty quiet bus.

hahaha.

happpppppy.

oh yeah.

i'm feeling tired.

gonna go watch my show, and then get ready for the long day tomorrow.

remorse.

2012-02-09T16:01:00.002+08:00

my eyesight is wavering.

haha.

waiting here in the empty canteen with myet.

no milo.

such a depressing thought.

hahaha.

man.

i dislike how things are.

but what can i do about it?

ah.

whatever.

crystal seems to be showing signs of improving.

and hopefully i'll be able to drop by the shop later

and get some supplies..

shopping always makes me feel better.

besides, tomorrow's a friday.

and what comes after friday is saturday!

and then sunday.

weekends.

pfft.

life is passing by really quickly.

at first it seemed like a monday...

then now its a thursday.

i feel like skipping school.

nonchalant.

2012-02-08T06:45:00.003+08:00

shit.

i ran for my stupid bus and it didn't stop.

that pisses me off.

so i woke up to a bad start today.

it just didn't feel right.

appropriate.

suitable.

normal.

all i could feel was how much you've forgotten about me,

how much you have given me up, how much you have not shown concern.

stupid bus.

why did you go pass?

now i need to wait for the next bus which would probably take a zillion years to come.

and all i can look forward to is seeing your bright face

that would only serve to piss me off even more.

please don't ask me about this.

im writing it out because i don't want to be reminded of it.

the brightness.

2012-02-07T18:47:00.005+08:00

so im currently standing in a very still position

due to the train being really packed and yet the doors ain't closing.

this is why i dislike public transport.

the train is already filled, but the doors don't close,

so when the next train(on the opposite side) arrives,

all these aunties and uncles (and etcetra) start to run

and rush and push their way through into these already filled trains,

hence making the air even more stale and the humidity higher.

and i just almost missed my bus.

hmm.

i ran because i didn't want to be at the front of the waiting line,

being the sucker who didn't catch the previous bus.

though being given the choice of seats i want is pretty awesome.

why am i talking about public transport.

so im posting now cause' today might very well end up like yesterday.

spent study hall in the library with chloe.

where i managed to do some of my chinese composition.

hahaha.

and it's the first time i wrote that long of a compo too.

then biology was in the lab,

and physics was just messing with my head.

so recess was pretty interesting today.

i like it when we get to laugh over the weirdest things.

then english.

and chemistry.

and amath. or emath?

both, really.

we got back our amath tests today.

and it sucked.

big time.

im actually not very surprised at this though,

given my shitty attitude i've been having this past month.

that reminds me.

i bumped into two people today. (at two different times)

and yes, they did look back at me.

and yes, i did apologise.

how could i not?

unless it was the person who knocked into me.

though sometimes i still find myself apologising

even when it's the other person who had bumped into me.

ah, whatever.

on overall..

the day went well, i guess.

and it probably went well because

i didn't put my hopes up.

but yet there were those little smiles that made my day.

i mean i know that i should be sad and disappointed

with my results and stuff

but i don't wanna let that dampen today.

cuase it's finally a day where i didn't have to wait for something to happen,

and it's finally a day where i could smile without having to need a reason to.

(or maybe not.)

there are plenty of reasons to smile.

life, itself, makes up ninety-nine percent of that reason.

wait. then what's that zero point one percent?

i don't know.

hehehe.

went home with carina today.

and ate some hot piping cakes.

what a wordy post.

stale.

2012-02-06T18:54:00.005+08:00

i guess im just gonna post now

cause i just missed my bus

and i probably won't have time to use the computer later..

so um.

normal, normal day.

lectured for emath,

scolded for chinese,

and then spent the rest of the day rather... sleepily.

not much of an interesting day, i guess.

so..

lets begin a long paragraph.

why are you such a bitch? you say that you would try, but you never do. you know that you have a deadline to fufil, but you still choose to do it last minute. you always complain and whine about things that you dislike, but you yourself do it too. you say that you wouldn't think that way, that you would be nice and polite, but you never do. you tell yourself you won't do it again. but you did. you repeatedly do the things you said you would never do. you procrastinator, you contradict. for now.. im still pretty messed up and have ran out of words to use.

and that's a paragraph for me to think about and scold myself over.

Silence.

2012-02-05T21:22:00.003+08:00

and i was that happy yesterday too.

why did you have to burst my bubble?

shit.

now i'm feeling like how everyone else is feeling today.

though i could actually say today went well.

now i'm continuing this post (just in case you realised the post is longer)

cause' i don't like how it looks when i have two posts in one day.

so.

yeah.

i don't know what to say man.

this is really weird.

and wrong.

and weird.

and wrong.

and confusing.

I have yet to touch my homework.

if i'm gonna be like this for today...

tomorrow's gonna be a heaven of a busy day.

i don't like how my thoughts run wild just cause' i saw something.

and then assume things.

and. stuff.

i hope.

that tomorrow would be fine.

and restore my shitty mood for now.

cause if only i didn't have to come home,

I WOULD BE IN THAT GOOD BLOODY MOOD I WAS IN.

yeah.

i have a blister on my foot.

from the constant rubbing against my sandals.

gah.

I can't find the right things to say,

i can't find the right things to do.

Should i go to bed now?

or should i go..

do my homework.

i have a period of study hall tomorrow.

but i'm afraid that i wouldn't be able to do my chinese book.

jeez.

Bunny bunny bunny.

had to feed her all sorts of medicine.

i think she's healing.

i just made a birthday card.

and whoever who's gonna receive it,

i apologise for the horrible "making" of the card.

cause' i was kinda.

rushing.

and stuff.

so yeah.

don't kill me please.

hahaha.

people.

please stop being sad.

when you're sad, i'm sad.

and no that doesn't apply to everyone but..

it applies to you guys.

that i hold so dearly.

hahaha.

now i sound really corny.

but hey.

i still love you guys.

Love.

2012-02-04T23:19:00.003+08:00

I LOVE YOU TOO.

Damn.

Walls.

2012-02-04T14:48:00.003+08:00

am at the vet clinic right now.

still waiting for my turn...

darn.

today passed by pretty quickly.

and the rest of the day is probably gonna pass by quickly too.

so woke up earrrrrly,

then had breakfast at mcdonalds.

then went to science centre..

and had some.

bio. dna lesson?

it was pretty cool.

fun, too.

then came home..

did some stuff and end up where i am now.

there's this kitty sitting on the sofa next to me,

staring out the window and watching as the passerbys go.

so adorable.

i want a cat.

hahaha.

so many animals..

why do they all have to come today?!

i bet it's cause it is after chinese new year,

and their pets ate too much.

hahaha.

ok im kidding.

im soooo lazy to wait.

bah.

still gotta meet chloe later

and then go to church..

do i have enough time?!

darn.

please please people, stop coming!

roar.

and there's another (friendly) couple across the room

who has a preggie dog.

haha.

cute cute cute.

and their vet is a really gorgeous caucasian,

who is explaning everything about the pregnancy,

describing how the babies look..

so cool.

and why am i telling you this?

i don't know.

bored and waiting for mah turn.

the cat's still cuter though.

hahaha.

Ignorance.

2012-02-03T23:11:00.002+08:00

why is everything coming all at once?

this is weird.

its amazing how i may have been such a bitch

and cursed and swore at how awful this whole situation is,

and all of a sudden,

thank god it's friday.

This is really, really weird.

so this morning,

we were told that we were to host students from a Japanese high school.

so cool.

i can't wait for that.

hahaha.

and there i was hoping i could email her(or him) and be like,

"Hello new friend! Could you help me get a couple of things from Japan?"

hahaha.

but the novelty wore off pretty quickly.

Then we got back our chemistry tests..

what depressing results.

shucks.

and i repeatedly told myself i would study,

and study, so much this year.

but here i am on the computer.

haha.

so um...

i think it was PE after that?

where we had our trial run..

did i do badly?

that's for me to know, and for you to find out.

haha.

recess.

physics.

and then end of friday.

oh, and choir.

but yeah.

i guess the day went well?

without bumps.

went out for dinner with a friend.

couldn't find my magazine.

bah.

i am pretty sure i'm in a good mood.

at least, not bad enough to be emo and not willing to do my homework,

but not good enough to be incredibly happy either.

maybe it's because im tired.

meh.

oh wow.

"meh".

i haven't use this word for awhile.

is it even a word?

ahaha.

i feel like sleeping.

there's still that biology trip tomorrow..

bah.

what a good day it has been.

(with no sarcasm intended.)

Angst.

2012-02-02T22:03:00.005+08:00

I feel like shit right now.

and i haven't touched my homework.

so i guess i have to rely on coffee for tomorrow.

it doesn't make a difference even if i sleep early anyway.

i'll still be that sleepy shitty bitch who doesn't try hard enough.

i still don't understand.

do you wanna talk or not?

if you're just gonna be like that,

then what the hell's the point?

i don't see us being friends anymore if you're just gonna continue being this way.

its amazing how that "closeness" could vanish that quickly.

if you don't realise,

i may have said that,

but i still give a damn.

i'm not some, horrible bitch who just says what she wants and then walk away.

I GIVE A DAMN.

and why?

because you are my friend.

and why are you my friend?

i don't know.

i don't know how things became like that.

is it because of me?

is it because of our surroundings?

is it because of the things that have happened recently?

no.

what the hell happened recently anyway?

damn it.

who the hell am i even talking about right now.

how i wish i could just stand up and tell you off right in your face.

tell you to shut the hell up cause' its not funny.

why do i even bother to type out this post?

cause' i know you won't read it.

and i know you won't care (even if you did read it).

So much.

inside of me.

spit it all out?

i probably typed this out with the hopes that you would read it and you would care.

loss of words.

2012-02-02T19:13:00.004+08:00

what to do, what to do.

differentiation in the morning,

then biology..

i flunked the section b.

gah.

then english.

recess.

humanities.

mother tongue.

and humanities again.

on overall, i guess the day went well...

but without any excitement.

which sucks.

then had a almost-two-hours-long supplementary,

where i got back my summary marks.

worst. summary. ever.

it's cold.

where the f iretruck are you?

February.

2012-02-01T19:25:00.004+08:00

okay.

today.

came to school early and finished up my mathematics..

then mingsiew came.

kekeke.

assembly.

then amath.

where i became super drowsy and sleepy.

then english.

Ms jane wasn't here today.

then chemistry.

blah.

alkanes, alkenes.

somewhat interesting.

i guess i didn't...

mind-drift that much during this lesson.

recess.

milo?

check facebook.

all eight of us bought milo.

heheh.

then chinese lesson.

where Chloe sped off halfway through the lesson.

and studyhall.

which was spent rather.... uselessly?

all my homework was at home.

then left school and went to teban with a couple of friends.

lunch.

given the 123654165329126918 number of cabs that passed by us while we were eating,

we thought we could just catch a cab to pioneer to watch the netball match (chloe!).

turned out,

after eating,

ALL THE CABS WERE GONE.

either they were already hired, or they just "nonononononononono".

damnit.

and i was so anxious and excited to watch this match.

if im not wrong, it was probably the only match i could actually watch Chloe play.

so then we gave up and took public transport..

and arrived only to see them already done with the match and having a debrief.

-sighs-

but oh well.

at least i got.

there.

and.

said.

hi.

moo.

mm.

wandered about.

then went home.

i'm in a neutral mood right now.

and so lazy to do my homework.

maybe i can sleep by ten today.

hoho.

that'll probably help with my sleepiness during classes.

oh right.

yesterday.

received my english mastery test.

i passed.

I PASSED.

I FREAKING PASSED.

damn was i overjoyed.

for the FIRST TIME.

I PASSED ENGLISH. (comprehension)

i don't care if it was still a lousy mark,

I STILL PASSED.

after all those days and months of receiving even worse marks,

I FINALLY PASSED DAMNIT.

i have so much hope in ms Jane right now.

haha.

and myself, of course.

(i think)

so.

yeah.

bye for now?

oh no wait.

it's february already.

a month has passed.

and soon it'll be march, april (yay!),

mother tongue olevels,

more months,

the whole other chunk of olevel exams,

and then its over.

four years in this school.

have i spent it well?

i don't know for sure.

battery-low.

2012-01-31T22:53:00.003+08:00

reminds me of the time you really, really cared for me.

panicked,

went practically hysteric,

worried,

all because of it.

i admit,

i was.

annoyed.

and found it weird that you gave that much of a damn.

of course it makes sense now.

and i miss it, actually.

miss the time you actually cared.

but i get what i deserve, don't i?

and that's just life.

so i suppose giving you up is the only right thing to do.

release the chains i placed upon you.

release the tight grips i had over you.

let you go free.

today.

2012-01-31T09:16:00.002+08:00

adrenaline rush.

this is so keeping me awake.

but this is wrong.

hahaha.

i feel ridiculous.

Doubt.

2012-01-30T20:18:00.001+08:00

this probably wouldn't last long.

but it's okay.

at least i get to enjoy it for now.

so today...

was as sleepy as shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh-

yeah.

sleeping late and a dosage of caffeine does not help.

i feel so lazy.

don't wanna do anything.

don't wanna feel anything.

Reunions.

2012-01-29T23:12:00.002+08:00

Awesome.

day.

now i gotta face my homework.

Buckle up!

2012-01-28T22:33:00.005+08:00

So today was fun.

really.

great.

day.

hahaha.

i'm in so much of a better mood now.

despite our long years of knowing each other,

i didn't actually except us to be able to talk..

like how we did?

so im glad today turned out well.

tomorrow's gonna be a busy day.

so i should probably do my homework now.

two hours.

and then another two more hours tomorrow.

oh yeah.

did sarah's nails.

2012-01-28T17:40:00.001+08:00

jayi is cute :D

Speechless.

2012-01-27T19:30:00.004+08:00

when i heard you say that,

i didn't know how to respond.

credits

damn am i glad i have you guys as my friends.

HAVE I NOT SAID HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU GUYS?

but anyway.

i came to school with a happy mood,

and came back with a shitty mood.

(where have i heard that before?)

haha.

but now it's fine.

gonna go to starbucks soon to meet Shiyin.

school was.

utterly boring.

so lets not talk about that.

Choir Concert.

March the sixteenth.

please go.

whoever you are.

you can get tickets from any chorister of commonwealth secondary.

so.

yeah.

support yeah?

you could come and.

you know.

invite your date,

bond closer with him/her during the concert.

hahaha.

Happiness.

2012-01-26T20:38:00.002+08:00

am i happy now?

i think i am.

i hope i am.

nah.

i AM happy.

look at those chips.

HOW COULD IT NOT MAKE YOU SMILE?!

i can't believe how strong you are even as life bores down on you.

you're a pretty admirable person.

haha.

So...

I should smile more.

be happier.

be satisfied and contended with life.

be nice, really.

Ms Jane didn't come for class today..

She didn't come yesterday either.

I hope she's fine.

cause' though i do smile when the teacher's absent (please don't tell on me haha),

missing out on lessons do mean missing out on our syllabus, no?

plus, its not like her lessons are that boring.

its kinda like mrs philips's lessons.

I'm glad you care, after all.

since i had that tinge of feeling that you didn't.

2012-01-26T06:48:00.003+08:00

the firetruck.

im so angry right now.

why do you always have to do this?

you're never satisfied with what i do.

if i dont do it, you're unhappy.

if i do it, you're still unhappy.

so what the hell am i suppose to do?

sit there and not give a damn?

angry with you,

angry with her,

angry with him,

angry with myself.

yesterday sucked.

2012-01-25T05:45:00.002+08:00

sup gangsta.

im currently....

doing my english project.

i enjoyed my coffee.

hehe.

gonna go change then get to school,

finish up mathematics homework,

get through my classes,

have the chinese new year performance,

hopefully do well for my humanities test,

and then quickly attack my english project,

AND I'M DONE WITH THE DAY.

hohoho.

as you can see, i woke up on the right side of the bed today.

2012-01-24T23:52:00.002+08:00

i've been rambling a lot lately, haven't i?

i wish you cared.

too many posts a day.

sometimes i don't like my posts without headings.

looks weird.

haha.

am trying to rush through my studying right now.

then move on to homework tomorrow morning...

or should i just finish up now.

hmm.

i don't know.

did some homework at spinelli with a friend today.

if you saw us, cool.

if you didn't, pretend you don't know.

unicorns.

such gorgeous, gorgeous creatures.

i should be studying now.

hahaha.

three more tests to go.

i don't think there's anymore holidays coming up.

darn.

and january's about to end.

that's pretty sad.

I may need to bring Crystal back to the vet this saturday.

I like how my life is crowded with things.

makes me feel like...

i'm alive.

though i hate having life filled all the time.

what am i talking about.

procrastination.

lessons.

classes.

gotta drink coffee tomorrow.

the reason i'm still not sleepy right now is probably the caffeine boost

i got from the mocha earlier on.

i should stop drinking.

it makes my teeth yellow.

-er.

since its already yellow.

haha.

then february comes.

and then more birthdays.

valentine's day.

more heartbreak,

more pain,

more love,

more shit in life.

after social studies...

should i do my homework?

or study.

hmm.

i think i should do my homework.

should i?

i don't know.

hmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

maybe i should finish my work today,

so that i could study in peace tomorrow.

no really.

but i'll probably get more work tomorrow.

OH FIRETRUCK.

Pins and needles.

2012-01-24T18:17:00.002+08:00

if i told you i wanted you to come back,

would you?

harrrrr.

im not some.

love sick person okay.

HAHA.

-cheating own feelings-

so...

i'm currently.

waiting.

hoping that you didn't just pangseh-ed me.

somehow my english has become so bad i don't even know what the proper word for that is.

today was a day full of...

work.

more work.

and even more work.

i've yet to study for my biology test.

oh come on,

are you really just gonna.

pull my hopes up,

and then walk away in a split second?

cause' hey man.

if you do that,

its over.

i don't care what friendship this is.

it's just.

over.

oh and i hope you don't read my blog.

cause' if you did...

i bet this would create even more misunderstandings.

which would be bad.

school starts tomorrow.

at least i have an extra hour to sit there and do my homework tomorrow.

no, make that two hours.

haha.

credits

2012-01-24T10:19:00.001+08:00

my windows live messenger account just got hacked.

haha.

real funny.

GET OFF MY ACCOUNT BITCH.

2012-01-23T23:12:00.001+08:00

i'm one messed up bitch.

invisibility.

2012-01-23T18:11:00.004+08:00

rightt.

i forgot.

happy chinese new year!

haha.

im still waiting here.

and i can't believe i told you.

now you're just gonna look at me weirdly, aren't you.

so..

woke up in the morning,

then went to grandma's place.

and then some visiting..

and photo-taking..

then came home to pick up some things.

where i found,

a dried, not-breathing, red fish.

yeah.

is that suppose to be some sort of message?

then went to visit akiko..

kyoko just slept the entire time.

harr.

and then i would think back to two years ago,

where she's that cute little kid who could smile so brightly

you'll smile too.

haha.

im obsessing over a small kid.

remember that?

then went to another grandma's place..

and now.

im tired.

and happy at the same time.

all that cashhhhhhhhhhh cha-ching!

but. but. but.

i shouldn't be spending it anyhow.

i should be doing my work.

Singaporean?

2012-01-23T00:01:00.001+08:00

WAH FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFIRETRUCK.

i was about to send a message.

AND THEN THE STUPID NETWORK CONGESTION HAD TO OCCUR.

WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLEM?!

I WAS JUST TRYING TO SEND AN INNOCENT TEXT MESSAGE.

NOT SOME MESSAGE GOING,

"oh, happy chinese new year! hong bao na lai!"

even though i already sent something like that

BUT

IM NOT EVEN SENDING THAT AT THIS HOUR OR TIME OR MINUTE OR WHATEVER

SO PLEASE STOP CONGESTING UP OR WHATEVER YOU'RE DOING

STOP IT

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Stares.

2012-01-22T23:31:00.005+08:00

go on bitch,

bring it on.

haha.

i've been in such a good mood these days.

maybe its the absence of lessons that is bringing about this change.

is that good?

hahaha.

i'm glad that i was able to end off with a happy note.

yes, being "high" does help a lot.

i love food.

then again,

i don't eat much,

but.

BUT.

i'm not a skinny dieting kid.

i just. have a small appetite.

SO STOP JUDGING ME.

hahaha.

so today...

dinner at grandma's.

well there was one yesterday too,

except at the paternal and maternal ones.

haha.

i love eating.. because i enjoy the food.

i really dislike eating for the sake of eating.

its such a. depressing thought.

so eat, CAUSE YOU ENJOY IT.

like how you live life cause you enjoy it.

(though im a pretty contradicting person)

i sound weird.

do i?

i don't know.

i just hope to see you as soon as possible.

why?

cause my heart yearns for ya!

duh.

stating the obvious.

hahaha.

goody goody good.

haven't decided what to wear for tomorrow.

the rain keeps on pouring.

no, i haven't seen any rainbow that everyone else has seen.

my vocabulary is improving.

just that slightest bit.

does this post consist of just nonsensical rambling?

hm.

my heart aches.

Across the room.

2012-01-22T18:06:00.001+08:00

I've done nothing at all these two days.

i should probably get to work.

BUT.

so many reasons to not do work.

hahaha.

buckle up.

2012-01-22T09:55:00.003+08:00

i don't want to talk to these two people beside me right now.

one is sleeping,

the other is highing about camp.

and previously both were using their phones.

roar.

hm.

am on the bus to church.

i'm afraid we'll be late.

Empty.

2012-01-21T18:02:00.002+08:00

oh shit.

you like her?

i am so ready to give up on you.

Promises.

2012-01-21T13:47:00.001+08:00

"when you care about something,

it ends up wearing you out."

Familiarity.

2012-01-21T07:59:00.004+08:00

ok.

im so much more energized right now.

so camp..

went down to bedok reservoir,

where we started a five-kilometers run.

or, you could also say, walk.

hahahaha.

i suppose i tried to run,

but after awhile,

you know.

dude.

five-kilometers.

i just.

walked.

cause' sports ain't my thing.

that made me sweat out like a crazy fool.

so then we had teabreak,

and then dragon boating.

it wasn't entirely fun,

but incredibly cooling.

the splashing of water on our skin,

it was so darn relieving.

and then we were all clean after that.

hahaha.

so all we did was change.

and sticky-free!

while the others who did the dragon boating first were sticky.

HAHA.

yes im gloating again.

hahaha.

but i suppose second day of camp was the most fun of all three days.

just my opinion.

some photos from camp?

and here's myet piggybacking me.

heh.

so after camp,

went out with the table-eight girls.

hahaha.

table-eight.

to west coast plaza,

for some ice creammmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

yeah.

jingyi's face.

hahahaha.

so then we played some games...

and then left.

went to jiehui's house,

met up with her for dinner at pastamania,

then came home.

and originally,

the plan was to sleepover at sy's.

this plan.

screwed up.

sadded.

not with just one thing,

but with a whole bunch of stupid shit i don't know what i'm talking about right now and besides even if you were to read this paragraph of nonsense i don't think i will make any sense cause' all im saying is that im pissed off with more than one thing and i can't say any of the "things" cause' that would be inappropriate and besides you would then find out all my secrets and i would die in shame and pain and heartbreak (really?). so yeah. why do you have to do this huh? why do you have to do this?! why must you do this to me, then walk away and go with someone else? this pisses me off. this probably applies to all the "things" i've been blabbering about in this paragraph. i really don't like it when we're friends but in real life, we pretend like we're strangers. if things were to work out that way, i rather not be friends at all. cause' i mean, i do treasure this friendship between us, but somehow, if we're not even gonna be talking, then forget it. i don't want to be there as a substitute. i don't want to be there for someone else i'm not. i want to be there as me, as who i am, as the person who loves coke and is dying from diabetes, as the person who is friends with you. BITCH!

hahaha.

no, i'm not talking about you.

Emotionless.

2012-01-20T21:46:00.001+08:00

I'm tired.

sleepy.

exhausted.

should i blog tomorrow instead?

wink, wink.

2012-01-19T17:09:00.004+08:00

sup guys.

camp camp camp.

morning was kinda just spent listening to talks.

"motivational" talks again.

then we went to sentosa,

for the amazing race.

it was fun.

really.

at first i totally didn't look forward to it,

but the competitiveness and atmosphere really made me feel good.

hahaha.

fun fun fun.

happy, too.

during the games,

i suppose my teammates were really enthusiastic

and participative.

and that's great.

im thankful for them.

(grace leehui rissa esther)

we made a complete wrong turn at one point of time.

wasted wayyyy too much time there.

then we got lazy and took the bus.

and met up with the group we were racing with.

who walked the way there.

hahahaha.

-gloating-

there were puzzles and riddles,

singing of songs (with much eagerness),

lots of running,

and the instant gratification with cold, cold coke.

haha.

am on the bus back to school now.

cheryl's next to me!

teehee.

sweaty and gross right now.

but i still gotta go tuition in an hour.

aw.

i kinda dont like the way i am when i'm high.

it's... weird.

and. somewhat.

i don't know.

maybe next time i'll ask someone about it.

the sun is really annoying right now.

though i love the warmth and glow of the sun,

it still pisses me off to an extent.

but i still love it.

haha.

for the sake of you.

2012-01-18T19:26:00.002+08:00

Hi.

i figured i should text now since im still waiting for the bus home.

roar.

why is it taking so long??!

and it's seven-thirty already.

so today was..

hm.

the entire day seemed to past really quickly?

it seems as if i was just sitting there doing my homework in the morning

and now im waiting for the bus home,

sweating.

there were ice breakers,

then "motivational" (i suppose) talks,

and then station games.

tomorrow's suppose to be at sentosa.

then friday at the bedok reservoir.

and then chinese new year.

hohoho.

i feel so accomplished since i did much of my work already.

gah.

did i mention before how much i dislike wearing

the school pe shirt?

i really dont like how the material is.

what kind of material is this anyway.

its supposingly dryfit,

but it doesnt feel dryfit at all.

and tomorrow we gotta wear that.

not. nice.

level t-shirt.

green green green.

looking forward to dinner of pratas tonight.

haha.

still waiting for ya to talk to me.

ok, scrap that.

i wait for that to happen all the time.

hahaha.

ms phoon is a really nice teacher.

in fact, i'm kinda glad i had her as my class mentor

these past three(and counting) years.

teehee.

went home with carina sixuan melody and ziyan.

and got my math questions set straight.

who. ray.

Tongue tied.

2012-01-17T19:37:00.006+08:00

So..

Yeah.

Hello there.

have i ever posted that picture up there?

cause' i swore i remember i did,

but i can't find that post.

haha.

School school school.

Study hall for first period.

Did. my biology work.

hah.

then bio lesson, followed with physics,

which, once again,

i've ended up in remedial.

darn it.

i seem to fail at everything right now.

then recess,

and english class.

received a thick, thick, THICK,

stack of papers.

comprehension papers, to be exact.

for semester one.

and now i dread what semester two would bring us.

chemistry, amath.

went for choir after that.

and yes.

finally.

FINALLY.

YOU TALKED TO ME.

-whistle-

Tomorrow's day one of camp.

do i look forward to it?

i don't know.

let's just say i'm trying to go to camp with a positive attitude.

yeah.

instead of my ugly, draining shitty attitude i usually go to camps with.

(Cambodia was an exception. Up till now i still miss that trip.)

hmm.

what else do i wanna say.

i've got homework?

oh oh oh.

the level camp t-shirt for this year.

what can i say?

hahaha.

haha.

ha.

SO.

not chio.

though i really didn't like the shirt in secondary two,

this is worse.

oh man.

comments on the shirt is pretty much flooding facebook.

hahaha.

and now i'm debating whether or not i should play sims.

yeah.

im fifteen-turning sixteen,

but who cares?

sims is awesome.

uh huh.

Conspiracy.

2012-01-16T21:03:00.005+08:00

Previous post;

each phrase has no link to each other by the way.

different different people.

darn it.

i hate how insecure i'm feeling right now.

how is it that you're able to help me this much?

School.

ridiculous day.

i hate it.

so much.

and yet i love it too.

to a certain extent.

no.

how about a small extent?

hah.

went to chloe's place after school to study for a bit.

bought food.

came home.

am ready to just.

do something about it.

i'm so bloody relieved it looks better now.

i don't care whether or not it looks better by A LOT,

or a little.

she just looks better now.

and that's what matters.

you know,

if i were to imagine a day without her,

or maybe.

like.

one day she's gone?

i would weep.

and mourn.

and who knows what the heck i'll do.

maybe kill someone else.

or just jump off...

my bed.

smash the paper balls around me.

weep even more.

weep weep weep.

WEEEEEEEEEEP.

i sound stupid.

distance ourselves.

2012-01-16T17:26:00.003+08:00

im so sorry i had doubt you.

i kinda got the feeling you were trying to say,

"fine, do whatever you want".

now i just hope i wouldnt see you that often anymore.

i dont want to have to sit there and wait for you.

oh, i get it alright.

i worry for you all the time.

god, please make things better for her.

emotionless.

2012-01-15T16:36:00.003+08:00

She seems to be getting worse and worse each day.

i feel like a shitty owner.//

church in the morning.

gloria baked a cake.

yummeh.

then went for tuition.

we ended up finishing work early cause' i forgot to bring my book.

so what did we do?

talk about bunnies.

and the future.

hehehe.

gonna go for vc concert later.

chloe's coming!

meet up with ziyan first though.

Pressure.

2012-01-14T16:30:00.002+08:00

Just brought Crystal to the vet.

She had a skin infection...

and there goes my monthly allowance.

For the sake of it.

2012-01-13T21:33:00.002+08:00

Ok.

yeah.

re-typed the post.

hahaha.

only had two lessons today.

followed by choir.

and then i got caught for hair..

darn ya.

and if you can't tell from the previous post,

went to watch the match this afternoon.

really cool.

kind of the first time i've actually watched a real, competitive match.

ahhhh shit.

i'm still panicky about stupid minor things.

what should i do?

oh man.

maybe i'll pin up my fringe on monday.

after that match,

had "dinner" at the mall.

fast food.

is.

good.

not.

yes.

not.

yes.

wha?

then looked for a basketball court.

which i sat there and did my homework.

hahaha.

then got ice cream with chloe.

and came home.

oh right.

crossed paths with shiyin on the way to the court.

competition.

2012-01-13T16:25:00.002+08:00

uh..

at. clementi sports hall now.

watching a basketball match between commonwealth and pioneer.

we're on par!

hohoho.

chloe: ohsht they lost the ball.

oh they got it back!

ah...

nice! -clap clap-

wow.

um.

cool.

this is really exhilarating to watch.

"You read too much into it"

2012-01-12T21:26:00.003+08:00

oh right.

i forgot.

school has been...

hectic.

these two days.

meh.

im tired.

got ice cream with Chloe yesterday.

after physics test.

hah.

then went home and died.

I don't know what i should do.

this feeling.

met up with Shiyin today.

her dogs are adorable.

i want a chinchilla cat.

yes.

i did just say,

a chinchilla cat.

hahaha.

I don't like this feeling.

2012-01-10T20:11:00.001+08:00

I do not,

i repeat,

give a fuck anymore.

Birthdays.

2012-01-09T22:51:00.007+08:00

Celebrated the first birthday of the year.

Darn,

today was good.

Now while i wait for my hair to dry...

so what did i do today.

was really sleepy during lessons.

i guess i gotta rely on caffeine tomorrow.

celebrated moses's birthday today,

with five birthday songs.

hahaha.

it was interesting.

and yes,

i did dye my hair.

moo.

more lessons,

then the release of Olevel results.

laughed and cheered my ass off with myet.

i guess..

its sorta a mental preparation for our turn,

but then again.

it wasn't that big of an impact.

People crying, people cheering,

oh man.

Had mos burger for lunch.

Ate the new, uh.

tobikiri wagyu burger?

if im not wrong.

brings up other memories of the last time we ate at mos burger.

"wagyu".

harr.

then studied for a bit with Chloe at mcdonalds.

met up with rayson,

then took the bus to sixth avenue to meet ms chia.

we were late.

really late.

no comment.

dinner dinner dinner..

it was. cool.

i still liked the part where we rushed to pay the bill.

now i'm home,

with a full stomach,

and a pile of notes beside the computer.

pimples popping up.

have a nice night.

Meow.

2012-01-08T16:26:00.003+08:00

Rolling, rolling.

cake for tomorrow.

God.

2012-01-07T22:24:00.002+08:00

Overwhelmed.

Engulfed.

Filled in.

His presence.

I've never felt so close to this before.

i'm thankful,

for those who have invited him,

and then for inviting me.

okay.

i don't know..

how to explain this.

meow.

the title should say it all, eh?

Open house.

2012-01-07T06:09:00.003+08:00

I don't care.

i really don't.

nah.

i do.

everybody knows i do.

hahahaha.

i'm on the verge of punching myself.

gonna go..

grab some breakfast at mcdonalds,

then catch a bus to school...

i know.

what the hell am i doing on the computer right now?

i'm... early.

really.

i woke up a tad bit too early.

HAH.

seriously.

today.

HAS

BETTER

THAN

YESTERDAY.

before i just give up on myself.

not.

i need to concentrate on my studies.

yep.

i need to stop thinking about unnecessary things.

yep.

i need to.. eat.

definitely.

bah.

if you're not gonna ask,

then...

i'm not gonna bring up the topic either.

why?

cause' i'll just feel like crap about myself.

and then end up feeling guilty about deceiving.

and then.

just rot and die.

and stone.

SINGLISH.

bai. now im gonna be late.

Gleeful!

2012-01-05T21:06:00.004+08:00

GOODY GOODY GOOOOOD.

happy.

despite having a full eight hours of sleep,

i was still having trouble trying to keep awake in classes.

aw.

three lectures today,

(which one of out three i kinda just dozed off)

and the rest were interesting(or just. there is SOMETHING that i could look forward to) classes.

hahaha.

did homework after the last class,

then went to get some tea with Carina.

it really...

helped me to keep awake during tuition.

hoho.

and i saw ruth.

and then met up with Shiyin after tuition.

to have a walk.

and talk.

about.

things.

HAHAHA.

THANKS GIRLFRIEND.

i hope tomorrow will be as good as today was.

I REALLY REALLY REALLY WANT TO-

Greed.

2012-01-04T19:35:00.001+08:00

Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeow.

Pepper lunch.

with Carina.

i want a bigger room.

a bigger table.

a bigger wardrobe.

a wider/larger/taller accessories rack.

MEH.

i want everything on earth.

hahaha.

Pies.

2012-01-03T20:16:00.003+08:00

Okay.

maybe if i don't think about it so much,

and instead replace it with the good things,

then yes,

i do feel much happier.

damn my heart was beating so bloody fast.

sunnies.

bleh.

no i don't zilian.

First day.

2012-01-03T16:27:00.003+08:00

So incredibly annoyed right now.

I should stop going to facebook.

(yes that does mean that i like to stalk people)

(like virtually, and not in reality)

(that would kinda be creepy)
(i should stop typing in brackets)

day one eh.

Was late for school.

darn.

hahaha.

no lessons today,

though there will be tomorrow.

hopefully i could just fill my mind with lessons.

and not pay attention to my distractions.

how do i avoid distractions?

aw man.

focus.

hocus?

pocus!

so the day was.

pretty...

relaxing?

a great way to start the first day.

but of course,

i'm superbly prepared for school.

the lessons, i mean.

however i did not expect to get that kind of a reaction from you.

you see?

that's why i should cease communication.

not with the entire world,

(or friends. and family. from singapore.)

but more of...

just you, you, you, you, and you.

and you!

bubble-ed tea with ziyan.

then got sushi.

yummy.

they actually have really good prices.

too bad the discount's only during a certain period of time,

so we kinda only can eat there when...

there's no cca.

aw.

In a good mood.

2012-01-02T19:28:00.004+08:00

So.

Studied in the morning with moses.

then came home, changed,

went out for lunch.

Japanese!

the awesome grilled cod fish.

so good.

then went shopping.

got a couple of shirts,

another skirt (similar to the one from australia),

and a pair of... boots?

hoho.

and i'm proud to say that i have finished my homework.

for good.

SO HAPPY.

and sad all at the same time.

for once,

i'm really excited for school.

and for once,

i really dread to see your face.

2012-01-01T04:07:00.002+08:00

I'm alive.

breathing ever so hard.

2012.

2012-01-01T01:38:00.004+08:00

screw resolutions.

i just wanna have a hell of a time.

hehe.

how's life?

mine is currently...

on the low side.

why do you always have to do that?

it makes me sad.

and that's probably the last face you'll ever see on this blog.

2011-12-30T16:19:00.001+08:00

yummo.

now what...

I do feel bad,

but at the same time.

How am i suppose to satisfy both sides?

i can't.

i can only do one.

I can't.

I can't deceive myself, can i?

meh.

whatever.

i'll....

i rather not think about it at all.

sup dude.

2011-12-29T23:31:00.002+08:00

yeah.

pretty much.

im coming home.

coming home.

tell my mum(or dad) im coming home.

let the rain.

wash away.

all the pain of,

yesterday.

im coming home.

coming home.

tell the world that...

sup dude.

hahaha.

sleepy.

tomorrow's gonna be busy.

i have no idea how i make life this difficult for myself.

expectations.

what do i expect out of myself?

i don't know.

i expect something,

but i don't have that...

i need to have it. get it.

its more of a ...

want?

if i tell myself im tired,

i give up.

i don't care,

i don't give a shit.

i don't bother.

well.

yeah.

sigh.

i wish i could make wishes.

2011-12-29T07:17:00.001+08:00

um.

again?

long.

2011-12-28T10:11:00.003+08:00

hi.

so...

what now?

i've never felt so cold in my life.

im homesick.

(probably)

i miss my bed.

my pillows.

my cold but warm aircon.

my room.

my laptop.

my animals.

my window.

my sunglasses.

my mirror.

my brother? hahaha.

my parents.

my cards.

my sense of satisfaction.

my short distance from the mcdonalds.

my...

everything.

hmm.

i feel like talking to you.

but i can't.

(obviously)

so what should i do?

should i...

type it out, only to delete it?

should i...

stare at that button on my phone,

wondering whether to click it?

should i...

just.

not.

do anything?

i need to charge my phone.

darn.

2011-12-27T10:17:00.001+08:00

um.

again?

hahahaha.

this is so laughable.

i really wish i could...

maybe i should write out her card now.

save me the trouble next time.

hahahaha.

i wished i could laugh it off.

Reasons.

2011-12-26T21:26:00.005+08:00

hmm.

so..

Abercrombie & Fitch?

I guess...

the models were hot.

and cute.

the female model was pretty.

clothes..

not. bad?

i don't know.

i didn't expect it to be so expensive.

Got more clothes today,

and yesterday.

and had wonderful meals.

oh right.

christmas nails.

i changed 'em up cause' i got bored.

yeah.

I love opening gifts.

ripping them open.

the excitement of what's inside.

I love love love cards too.

When its full of words and really just,

I'm bad at talking today.

i should stop.

went out for dinner with ms chia.

japanese.

hah.

2011-12-26T09:07:00.001+08:00

It's unsettling.

How do i erase this feeling?
Sleep it off?

What the hell man.

2011-12-25T16:35:00.003+08:00

merry christmas guys.

god bless ya'll.

chilling in a hotel now.

the food here,

is so darn good.

too bad i left my camera at home.

aw man.

the coffee.

the cheesecake.

the ham and bread.

sooooooooo good.

can't wait to go shopping.

(though my parents are really unwilling to...)

Faults.

2011-12-24T10:40:00.004+08:00

Update on Rainy.

She's living happily with Crystal now.

So much that she doesn't even wanna play with me.

meh.

i've still yet to do a fish post.

and..

the numbers have deteriorated.

so i bought one new one a couple of days ago.

2011-12-23T20:57:00.003+08:00

um.

...

Incomplete.

2011-12-23T00:19:00.003+08:00

oh hey.

Chilled with Ziyan today.

Bought.

lots.

of.

things.

-sigh-

2011-12-21T10:12:00.006+08:00

WHAT THE FUCK?

2011-12-20T22:06:00.004+08:00

not impressed.

ohemgee.

2011-12-19T23:04:00.007+08:00

What a night.

so...

met up with chloe in the morning.

took the bus to vivo,

then got decorations,

party stuff.

then..

had lunch at superdog,

where we met up with carina, binjie and zuriel.

went to jason's.

decorated the place.

it wasn't very.. fun?

had dinner.

took out all the glowsticksss.

oh yeah.

then we went down to play games.

team games.

now fun.

i guess. for me.

heheheheehheeh.

teamed with leonard first,

then ernest.

man, are guys rough.

but it was fun.

exciting.

competitiveness. (is there such a word?)

adrenaline.

crazyness.

running, waryness.

damn.

the game got really intense.

i guess.

So maybe we started to look like the crazy teenagers

who wanna pick a fight in the middle of the night.

(hey it rhymes!)

no, we weren't fighting.

we were playing a damn game.

got complains from the residents.

then the police was called.

we were "detained", i suppose.

for awhile.

i wouldn't go into that much of a detail for now i guess..

despite my already detailed post.

honestly,

when i first saw the policemen,

my mind was just screaming "run".

i know, i know.

what on earth was i doing?

it wasn't like we were committing a crime,

or anything that involves being chased after.

but.

i don't know.

a night i wouldn't forget.

definitely.

2011-12-18T23:13:00.001+08:00

Hi.

Ran quite a few errands today.

Christmas concert with Chloe and Moses.

Goodnight people.

2011-12-17T00:00:00.002+08:00

if it makes you happy,

i'm happy.

and when this happens,

i know i truly care for you.

Surfing.

2011-12-16T18:08:00.003+08:00

Spent the evening scrubbing, washing, cleaning, changing,

and whatnot with the cages.

Cause' yesterday,

Dad got a new cage for the bunnies.

Today.

Placed Crystal and Rainy in the same cage.

Cleaned out the old cage,

and placed the cavies in that cage.

Now the old, old cage?

I don't know what to do with it.

And i'm pondering whether or not i should get the bedding for the animals.

Sure, expenses are really heavy,

but....

Clean, happy animals.

Is it not worth it?

I don't know.

Gotta discuss it over with my dad.

Meh.

////////

Made kahlua balls.

Or, supposingly rum balls,

but i didn't have rum.

For decoration of the cake.

heheh.

Shiyin came over,

had breakfast at mcdonalds!

Pancakes.

Mmmm.

Then she baked up some really good coffee cupcakes.

Basically...

The day past really fast.

MOO.

gonna go take a bath now.

BYE.

Melbourne, Australia.

2011-12-15T09:46:00.003+08:00

Day one.

Airplane ride.

It was really draggy cause' of the transit flight.

But at Adelaide,

there was this, dog-sniffing security.

Super cool.

It was a beagle, and it was realllllly cute.

The weather there was really awesome.

Cold air, bright sun.

I can't say how much i love this place.

Low rise houses,

Green, green grass,

SHOPPING,

oh yeah.

Korean food for lunch.

After unpacking,

mum and I went down to chadstone for a bit of shopping.

Found Illamasque!

but at a great price.

Stayed at a relative's house,

but the house was huge.

The bathroom was the size of my bedroom. (or maybe even bigger)

Carpet flooring, huge living spaces, walk in closets.

Damn i'm envious.

They had five cars.

Day two.

Woke up early in the morning,

then went down to the city to catch a bus.

Country side.

Had morning tea and lamingtons.

then watched birds.

Red bird.

I love these wings when they're flapped out open.

but the last time i was here,

there were more birds.

Next, took the puffing billy train

from belgrave to menzies creek.

Really, the whole trip was trees, trees, and more trees.

But the weather was good.

This cute guy said hi.

and of course yes, i had to say "cute" guy.

Australians are realllllllllly friendly.

Had lunch at this old restaurant i visited before, ten years ago.

Looks the same.

(as far as i can remember)

Lips felt incredibly chapped.

Grandpa drank A LOT of wine.

red wine.

(and white wine.)

Next, went to Healesville sanctuary.

Dingos.

there were a couple more animals/birds/idontknowwhat

that i saw,

but the pictures aren't really.. worthy of putting it up.

So yeah.

Animal clinic.

It's really cool.

Someday you'll see me there.

(haha.)

kangaroos.

Koala.

Sleepy koala.

Random bird that was stalking us.

Then we had Greek food for dinner.

Souvlaki.

At which point my attitude turned for the worse.

Day three.

Same as usual,

go to the city, take a bus.

This time to some. Sea. Place.

Hold on.

Lemme google this.

Ah-ha.

Great Ocean Road.

And the realisation of this.

How could i not have realise it long ago?!!

MEH.

Had coffee and macarons.

I've never had macarons,

but these were fabulous.

Sweet, crumbly, yum.

Grandpa feeding seagulls.

Bus ride.

Winding roads,

farm animals,

horses, cattles, sheeps.

Rocks, rocks and more rocks.

It wasn't exactly interesting to me,

so imma combine all the pictures together.

Grandpa feeding even more seagulls again.

It seems that he's really...

Interested in animals.

Chinese food for dinner.

Chinese people in a chinese restaurant speaking english.

Oh yeah.

If i remembered correctly,

we had noodles.

With pork.

The soup was good.

Day four.

Woke up at. Eleven?

I don't know.

Slack day.

Washed up,

then followed my mum, aunt and cousin to get stuff.

Bought bubble tea.

Then korean food for takeaway.

Went to woolsworth,

where I FOUND SO MUCH CHEAP BAKING NEEDS

I HAD TO SPLURGE.

sorry.

I had to CAPS that too.

heh.

I'll show you my stash later.

So you can see.. How much i really bought.

After lunch,

went shopping at Chadstone (again).

Bought a bunch of random items.

Again, later.

Stash.

Sat down for a cuppa coffee.

Which... My uncle accidentally dropped a spoon in it

before i got the chance to take a photo

of the perfect heart swirl.

Chinese for dinner.

We're always eating asian food.

-sadded-

but today was fun.

Day five.

Mum drove down (along with a bunch of other relatives)

to Dandenong.

Had pies at pie in the sky.

Not bad, i guess.

Splurged in the shops along the street.

Aunt Michelle got this really adorable Peter Rabbit soft toy for me,

cause' i was gushing over how soft it was.

(cringe)

Then got this pair of earrings.

andddd.

Little bunnies.

Then sky high,

which was really just..

Nature.

Here,

i'll show you an example of what i meant.

Went to miss marples for dessert.

the interior design.

Really cozy and pretty.

then went to the tea shop next door.

Meh.

Tea.

then it started to rain.

Went down to the city,

where we didn't really get to buy much.

In fact, i don't think i remember buying anything..

Oh.

Nail polishes.

that's all.

Given the limited time and my empty shopping bag,

yeah.

You know it.

Day six.

Wedding day.

The bride.

I did get a couple of snapshots of her eating,

but.

Unglam.

Yeah.

At the church.

and i was actually about to place a picture of my aunt and an ice-cream truck here,

but then i realised.

-insert smiley face-

Those who know what i'm talking about, will know what i'm talking about.

-insert a grin-

Tea room.

Guestbook?

Oh and they had this.

Photo booth thing.

So you could take snapshots

and then put it into the guest book.

Cousins and I.

(and aunt.)

Grandparents.

Before photobooth shot.

hahaha.

Bridal party.

WEDDING CAKE.

look at that pretty decorations.

Our dinner consisted of..

Food.

Yeah.

Lobster?

and then we got tired and went home.

And accidentally set off the alarm in the house.

Damn was it loud.

and attention-seeking.

Even the neighbours came out to check.

and offer their help.

such nice, friendly people.

wedding nails.

Day seven.

Church service in the morning.

Given the saga the night before,

i had reallllllllly little sleep.

So.

Yeah.

Lunch, then to boxhill to get barbecue stuff.

Then to Chadstone.

Again.

Hohoho.

Bought my forty-bucks skirt,

seems to be the in-fashion in Australia now.

(i think)

Now i know i'm not a model or whatever,

but the picture's just to show off the awesome skirt.

not my. fugly. legs.

I liked the skirt.

My brother thinks otherwise,

so i don't know what the "normal" reaction would be.

meh.

Then a five-dollars shirt at the same store.

Come on.

Five bucks.

How could i not get it?

hahaha.

It was on sale anyway.

Then another shirt at sports girl.

Time restrain,

so that's pretty much all.

Oh, and then a lipbalm at portmans.

Since i finished mine. (for the first time)

Got even MORE baking supplies.

stopped by to get snacks.

Popcorn chicken.

This was wayyyyyyy more tender than the ones back home.

and they give you free wet tissues!

... and you have to pay for sauces.

Then the barbecue.

Next day was flight back so.

Yeah.

END.

oh no wait.

here's my stash.

yes i know i'm a spoilt girl

but HEY half the stuff were for friends.

so.

yeah.

teehee.

afterthoughts.

my relatives were all really welcoming,

the place was super comfortable,

but honestly,

i'm not gonna say much about this trip.

I'm just glad I am back home.

2011-12-14T20:16:00.004+08:00

My heart aches.

Not in a lovey-dovey way,

but you get the gist.

i hope.

I've lost the will to care about you.

(yeah i get it the picture has no link to any of this shit i'm saying)

Busy.

2011-12-13T12:37:00.004+08:00

nails right now.

illamasqua in muse.

best forty-nine Aussie dollars spent.

(along with viridian)

after the cool (cold) temperature in melbourne,

the "cold" here now seems normal.

haha.

///

Need to get stuff.

Got a new calendar,

and while i was filling up the birthday reminders..

I realised.

How as each year goes,

names disappear,

and new names come in.

Friendship sinks,

and new relationships form.

Haha.

Do i really care?

I don't know.

Gotta finish up planning my stuff before heading out to get rabbit food.

Hugs.

2011-12-12T05:10:00.002+08:00

I love them.

They are like this simple action,
that brings across feelings and affection and what not.

But it doesn't apply to all cases, of course.
It depends on the situation, the person, the relationship between the two.

And now, all i feel is.
Confused.

No it's not five am in the morning here,
probably eight.

Last hours in melbourne.
I do feel that tinge of pulling at my heart.
I can't decide.

Why am i like this?
Why do i think this way,
or feel this way?

And then i feel that its unnatural for me
if i were to act a different way,
with probably a better outcome.
Damn.

What the hell.

That empty space.

2011-12-11T17:44:00.002+08:00

I do wish to try getting drunk one day.
Maybe at home.

Cause' being drunk and half-conscious of what you're doing
isn't a very good thing.

Imagine doing something really awkward and embarrassing and not even knowing it.
That'll suck.

Flight back home tomorrow.
The week really past very fast.
I wish it'll pass faster.
(for the moment, not the entire holiday.)

I really need to sleep.
All these late nights are taking their toll on me.
Incredibly unwilling to make the first move cause' im just that girl.

Maybe i'll do my australia post on tuesday.
Or wednesday.
I feel lazy.
And i've still a bunch of things to do before christmas.

This itouch has proved its worthy.
Wonders, it has done.

Today's weather is cold.
Like cold, cold. Plus wind.

I miss rainy. And crystal. And bobby. And terra.
And the fishes. (or maybe not that much)

2011-12-06T18:00:00.002+08:00

Hello.
Im alive.
Australia's beautiful.

The weather is fabulous.
Maybe like japan's weather?
Its summer here though.
Airconditioned weather with a bright sunny sun.
Hahaha.

I love how im just dying to be back in singapore.

Hello.

2011-12-03T22:36:00.004+08:00

i took a shower.

came out.

looked at the mirror.

there was blood on my face.

nails right now.

gonna switch it up to wedding nails soon.

still thinking about whether or not to do my hair.

meh.

lots of packing to do.

so far,

i only packed my nail essentials.

heh.

oh and tested out the devil's food cake today.

yum.

look at how decadent this is.

bunny.

2011-12-02T11:40:00.000+08:00

someone keeps turning off my alarm.

pissed off.

2011-11-30T23:12:00.003+08:00

I wanna rant.

But.

Before that.

had a good sleep.

debate over whether to get Sims 3 pets,

then Kiasin came.

Bought groceries first,

then made our baked rice,

and painted her nails.

Yeah.

Short and simple.

///

gah.

im not too sure about my choice of words right now.

nevermind.

another time.

Animals.

2011-11-30T12:10:00.000+08:00

i want this.

really badly.

Shopping.

2011-11-29T23:19:00.003+08:00

bought shoes for the wedding dress.

(attending. not. getting married. that would be odd.)

then a cropped-hoodie-top.

im loving it.

happy?

i don't know.

i think i'll change up my nails.

i got bored of them really quickly.

maybe this is how.

this is bad.

Run.

2011-11-28T22:46:00.003+08:00

and yet another post.

maybe a rant.

we'll see how it goes.

I'm so-

i don't know.

pause.

look in front.

see no end.

look back.

think.

imagine what it could be.

run.

What do i really hate?

When i run out of topics.

It sucks.

It really does.

I would just sit there,

overly-conscious of everything,

wondering what the hell to say.

what topic to start.

what conversation to explore.

I really don't like the phrase,
"so what are you doing?"

cause you know what?

that just shows that;

a) you're interested in knowing what i'm doing.

(oh come on, how interested would you be in knowing that i'm sitting infront of a computer?)

b) you have ran out of things to say.

and the fact that we really have nothing to talk about anymore,

really sucks.

its like how i'm just begging for a common topic that we could talk about,

discuss,

laugh,

and be happy and grow closer as friends.

but i can't find it.

i can't.

no matter how hard i think,

how hard i look around at inanimate objects,

how hard i just fucking go crazy about it,

i can't.

i just bloody hell can't.

what does this say?

i don't know.

what i DO know is that i wanna continue to be as close as how we are,

or even closer.

Why on earth would i wanna cause this friendship to sink?

but no matter how much brain cells i kill

trying to think of a topic,

i can't find one that would last.

this doesn't apply to just a friend of mine.

it applies to many.

a lot.

i don't know.

am i that boring?

are we really at that end where we can't go further?

what the hell am i talking about?

pause.

look back.

think about the memories you have etched in your mind.

smile.

i think i just made myself even more frustrated.

Tilt-shift.

2011-11-28T21:12:00.004+08:00

this shit is amazing.

credits:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/manzari/2116442758/

2011-11-28T18:24:00.001+08:00

done.

I have yet to do my fishy post.

Laughter.

2011-11-28T14:06:00.006+08:00

Oh yeah.

Finally, the week where i don't really do anything.

I sense the little happiness creeping back in.

Friday Nov 25:

Went for open house preparation,

then rehearsals for choir.

I feel out of place.

lost my pink scissors.

Saturday Nov 26:

Open house.

Stayed at the Cambodia booth in the morning,

then went up to get dressed for the Choir performance.

It was a.. busy day.

I guess.

Not as busy as i thought it would be,

but it was. Well. Full.

Of things.

Dinner at grandma's, as usual.

found my pink scissors.

Sunday Nov 27:

Church,

then some play time with the animals.

I don't really know what Crystal wants.

With the wire mesh,

she just sniffs her.

Without the wire mesh,

she chases her.

man.

Dinner at the red chef.

Yoghurt was good.

Today.

Morning breakfast with ms Chia.

Pancakes, as usual.

Why do they call it hotcakes?

Pancakes. Hotcakes.

What's the difference.

I wanna watch some drama.

But i'm sick of having to sit there and watch it buffer,

and then pause at random times.

Honestly, i'm a fan of vampires.

Vampire love stories?

Oh yeah.

Ah.

I'll shut up about that.

I gotta do some homework.

November's ending really really really soon.

And december..

CHRISTMAS.

oh yes.

That's one thing i'm waiting for.

and then there's the trip to australia.

and also chinese new year.

MONEY.

i'm a money grubber.

i believe i've said that tons of times in this blog.

hoho.

Walked down to the pet shop after breakfast to get supplies.

busted my wallet.

it was a nice time.

probably gonna go shopping tomorrow.

...

i'm gonna insert a photo.

and now i'm off to be little vain me.

(eg. nails. i haven't had them painted for some time now.)

2011-11-25T19:25:00.000+08:00

GAH.

so much things to do.

I feel like punching someone.

2011-11-24T23:10:00.002+08:00

Oh.

How nice.

How could this, so called happiness just disappear so quickly?

What the hell did you do, man?

hehe.

2011-11-23T21:22:00.002+08:00

Went out to Vivo with Ziyan today.

Had lunch at subway,

then shopped around.

Decided on a couple of Christmas gifts,

got a gift for a certain someone (remember yesterday's drawing of lots?),

and then bought a shirt cause' it was cold.

and, i mean,

wore that shirt for the rest of the day.

Watched Kaiji: the ultimate gambler.

It was pretty... cool?

Kinda similar to the first movie, i guess.

Went home a happy girl.

Still pretty pumped up about the Christmas gifts.

the suspense is excitingly FUN.

Pre-Christmas Awesomeness.

2011-11-22T23:28:00.022+08:00

I just had the most awesome party ever.

(or something.)

Woke up nicely in the morning,

watched a couple of eps of a drama,

then the guys came.

Played kinect and band hero.

then the girls came.

Then we went shoppinggggggggg.

at cold storage.

hah.

i have no idea how he did that.

Carina!

bought a hundred and sixty-six dollars worth of food.

started up our barbecue,

then we went swimming.

ernest.

jianhui.

pffft.

there were tons of jumpshots.

floating on water.

blub blub blub.

Rocked out.

Got complained.

Said our goodbyes.

oh!

and we did this drawing of lots thing.

Where everyone had a chance to pull out a 'lot',

and get a christmas present for the person they have gotten.

Cool eh?

I'm tired.

I'm gonna go clean Rainy's cage now.

Till the next party then.

2011-11-21T19:24:00.003+08:00

Just finished my cake.

hohoho.

Went out for a movie with friends today.

happy.

Broke.

Wasted.

2011-11-20T22:44:00.003+08:00

Spent the day..

Slacking.

As usual.

Baked up a red velvet cake,

which i shall complete tomorrow morning.

Went to church,

then Chloe came over,

and we spent the day lazing on the couch,

watching the vampire diaries.

Season three.

I have no idea why we skipped season one and two.

But now,

i just feel so lazy to go back to the past seasons.

But it IS a pretty good show.

Hotter guys, better story line.

Rather than... You-know-what.

I'm beginning to neglect my phone.

I'm gonna go take a bath..

Maybe play around with the bunnies for awhile.

Then bed time.

Daze.

2011-11-19T17:20:00.003+08:00

So yesterday.

I sat for a good four hours (or even more),

doing homework.

with linpaing.

then he left for his cca,

and i met up with myet.

more homework.

(or maybe more of me just cutting up rubber bands.)

Went for my dental.

The dentist said i had a tooth decay.

She started to stick her tool in my tooth.

and apparently it was sticky.

So she drilled a hole,

cleaned it,

and filled it up with medicine.

Damn it was painful.

And she told me to avoid cold drinks for a week.

Just awhile ago i forgot and ate ice cream.

It hurt like a bitch.

So after dental,

went to Shiyin's,

where we chilled.

and she made me pasta.

ohohoho.

and then we watched Black Swan.

It was...

incredibly intriguing.

mind fuckery?

I don't know.

Did some homework,

took a long nap on her chair,

watched more TV,

and then slept.

and this morning,

went to have brunch with her family,

then to Choir.

for a short while.

probably the last time i'll see my seniors.

I'm gonna go take a bath now.